Back to Kindergarten Basics

 When I was 5, the preschool teachers had a conversation with my mom about my limited knowledge of the colors. I received F's all the time on my coloring pages. Mom worked with me on identifying all of the colors, but the F's kept coming. In a parent-teacher conference, the teachers felt that I could not learn my colors. My mom called me over, and I named every color around the room. The teachers asked me why I didn't use the colors they told me to use on the coloring pages. Mom said I said, "You choose ugly colors." I was just a tad precocious.

With my eye condition, I can no longer identify colors well. The challenge of becoming colorblind means the colors I see are not the true colors of anything. Almost 90% of the time, I am wrong. For those born with color blindness, they usually cannot tell the difference between reds and greens or blues and yellows. I struggle with telling the difference between any of them.

 Last Friday, I was shopping at a boutique inside my mom’s hair salon. I had to carry everything to Mom for her to describe the colors. After mistaking lilac for green, I broke down and cried. 

Just when I think I am getting a handle on my visual situation, I get sideswiped. I am a very independent lady, and having to rely on family, friends, and complete strangers to do a kindergarten basic, identify colors, is a kick to my pride and extremely humbling.

I've relied on myself to get things done. Sometimes, it's easier doing the work instead of asking for help. In and of itself, that isn't a bad thing, yet it also means I rarely ask for help, ever. Now, Ms. Independence needs help daily for the big things, seeing steps in the dark, and the little things, matching my clothes.

God’s lesson for me is that we should never be so independent that we are basically alone all the time. We do not rely on others for companionship or friendship. This has been a hard lesson to swallow not because I don’t want companionship or friendship, but because I need help daily. My nature is to be a server, a servant leader, not a receiver. And now...I'm on the receiving end a lot.

Having Christian family and friends makes a HUGE difference when going through life. We pray for one another and support one another. We laugh together and cry together. 

Proverbs 18:24 "One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."

Proverbs 17:17 "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity."

As I struggle with my new reality, there is humor in my everyday. When I told my sister about my lack of color recognition and that I'd be failing kindergarten, she said, "At least you can read." Someone else asked my opinion on the color of a dress. I gave them "the look." I asked a lady at TJ Maxx about the color of a water bottle. She said sienna. Because I had a puzzled look on my face, her son chimed in and said reddish brown. I don't remember learning sienna in school. Oops...

Bearden's Life Nuggets

Be a blessing to others and let them be a blessing to you.

Choose to laugh at the situation instead of mourning. Proverbs 31: 25

Life is tough. Life without friends and family is tougher. 

Life without Christ is inconceivable.  Romans 10:9-12 

We the Kingdom: "God So Loved" https://youtu.be/jasoo3UDSwY?si=rUpyNP3tGyBZqugU




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